The Transforming Power of Forgiveness

Dear brothers and sisters in Messiah יהושוע, Today I invite you to reflect on a subject deeply woven into our faith and the teachings of Scripture — forgiveness.

As followers of the Messiah, we are called to embody the transformative power of forgiveness in our lives, relationships, and communities. Together, let us journey into the depths of this divine principle and explore how it can bring healing, reconciliation, and grace into our lives.

What Is Forgiveness?

Before we turn to Scripture, it is helpful to begin with a simple, common understanding of what forgiveness means. Looking first at a general definition provides a foundation from which we can explore the far deeper meaning revealed in the Word of יהוה.

The Cambridge Dictionary defines forgive as “to stop blaming or being angry with someone for something they have done, or to choose not to punish them for it.” It defines forgiveness as “the act of forgiving, or the willingness to forgive.”

The Greater Good Magazine from the University of California, Berkeley, offers a broader perspective:

“Psychologists generally define forgiveness as a conscious, deliberate decision to release feelings of resentment or vengeance toward a person or group who has harmed you, regardless of whether they actually deserve your forgiveness.

Just as important as defining what forgiveness is, though, is understanding what it is not. Experts who study or teach forgiveness make clear that when you forgive, you do not gloss over or deny the seriousness of an offence against you. Forgiveness does not mean forgetting, nor does it mean condoning or excusing offences. Though forgiveness can help repair a damaged relationship, it doesn’t obligate you to reconcile with the person who harmed you, or release them from legal accountability.

Instead, forgiveness brings the forgiver peace of mind and frees him or her from corrosive anger. While there is some debate over whether true forgiveness requires positive feelings toward the offender, experts agree that it at least involves letting go of deeply held negative feelings. In that way, it empowers you to recognise the pain you suffered without letting that pain define you, enabling you to heal and move on with your life.”

One of the Hebrew words translated as forgive is sālaḥ (H5545). According to Gesenius’ Hebrew–Chaldee Lexicon, it means “to pardon, forgive.” Related terms in other Semitic languages such as Chaldean and Arabic carry meanings like “to be merciful,” “to be propitious” (that is, favourably disposed or benevolent, as defined by the Merriam–Webster Dictionary), and “to show oneself gentle.”

Forgiveness is a central theme throughout the Scriptural narrative. Through the sacrifice of יהושוע the Messiah, we have been offered the ultimate act of forgiveness — redemption from sin and reconciliation with Aluhym.

As followers of Messiah, we are called to reflect that same spirit of forgiveness in our daily lives. We are instructed to forgive as we have been forgiven, extending grace and compassion to others. This is echoed in Ephesians 4:32:

“And be kind towards one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as Aluhym also forgave you in Messiah.”

In this verse, the Greek word translated “forgave” is charizomai (G5483), which comes from the root charis (G5485) — the primary New Testament word for “grace.” This connection shows that grace and forgiveness are inseparably linked.

According to Thayer’s Greek Lexicon, charis means “that which affords joy, pleasure, delight, sweetness, charm, loveliness, goodwill, loving-kindness, favour,” and “contains the idea of kindness which bestows upon one what he has not deserved.” Together, these meanings paint a vivid picture of forgiveness as an act steeped in grace — a generous, undeserved kindness that embodies the fullness of what Scripture calls us to live out.

Forgiveness as Covenant Faithfulness

Forgiveness is also a sign of covenant loyalty. Throughout Scripture, יהוה’s forgiveness restores His people to covenant fellowship with Him — as seen in Nehemiah 9, where the people confess their sins and recount how, despite generations of unfaithfulness, יהוה repeatedly forgave and did not forsake them, renewing His mercy and sustaining His covenant with them. This same covenant mercy is echoed in the promise given through Jeremiah (Jeremiah 31:33–34), where יהוה declares that in the new covenant He will forgive the sins of His people and remember them no more.

Our willingness to forgive others is not merely an act of kindness; it is part of living faithfully within the covenant, just as a husband or wife chooses to extend grace within marriage vows despite failings.

What Does The Word Of יהוה Say About Forgiveness?

It is vital for us to examine יהוה’s Word so that we know how to conduct ourselves. As 2 Timothy 3:16–17 reminds us:

“All Scripture is breathed by Aluhym and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for setting straight, for instruction in righteousness, that the man of Aluhym might be fitted, equipped for every good work.”

With this in mind, let us look at some Scriptures that speak directly about forgiveness.

Jeremiah 31:34 declares:

“And no longer shall they teach, each one his neighbour, and each one his brother, saying, ‘Know יהוה,’ for they shall all know Me, from the least of them to the greatest of them,” declares יהוה. “For I shall forgive their crookedness, and remember their sin no more.”

This verse is part of Jeremiah’s prophecy of the new covenant — established through the blood of the Messiah because we broke the former covenant. In this covenant, our crookedness is forgiven, and our sin is remembered no more.

The writer of Hebrews applies this very promise to the work of Messiah, quoting it in Hebrews 8:12:

“Because I shall forgive their unrighteousness, and their sins and their lawlessnesses I shall remember no more.”

And again in Hebrews 10:17:

“Their sins and their lawlessnesses I shall remember no more.”

Through Messiah’s atoning sacrifice, this prophecy is brought to fulfilment — we stand forgiven, cleansed, and restored to covenant fellowship with יהוה. HalleluYah for this!

Sha’ul speaks of this forgiveness in his letter to the Colossians, those of the nations, who had turned from their false worship to the worship of the true Aluhym.

“That is also why we, from the day we heard, have not ceased praying for you, and asking that you be filled with the knowledge of His desire in all wisdom and spiritual understanding, to walk worthily of the Master, pleasing all, bearing fruit in every good work and increasing in the knowledge of Aluhym, being empowered with all power, according to the might of His esteem, for all endurance and patience with joy, giving thanks to the Father who has made us fit to share in the inheritance of the set-apart ones in the light, who has delivered us from the authority of darkness and transferred us into the reign of the Son of His love, in whom we have redemption through His blood, the forgiveness of sins, who is the likeness of the invisible Aluhym, the first-born of all creation.” — Colossians 1:9-15

In this passage, Sha’ul connects forgiveness directly to redemption in Messiah. He reminds the Colossians that their entire standing has been transformed: they have been delivered from the authority of darkness, transferred into Messiah’s reign, and granted an eternal inheritance among the set-apart ones. This deliverance is not by their own merit but is secured “through His blood” — the costly sacrifice that purchased their forgiveness. Here, forgiveness is not portrayed as a small or isolated act, but as the very heart of salvation itself, flowing from יהוה’s love and power.

Next, we read Psalm 103:2–3, which says:

“Bless יהוה, O my being, and do not forget all His dealings, who forgives all your crookednesses …”

As we reflect on this verse and those preceding it, we are reminded that if the Creator of the universe, in His love and kindness, can extend forgiveness to us — despite our unworthiness and the enormity of our sins against Him — and even go to the lengths of self-sacrifice to grant it, then we too must find it within ourselves to forgive one another. In following יהוה’s example, forgiveness may also require personal sacrifice.

The greatest example of this is seen in Messiah’s own words during the Passover meal:

“For this is My blood, that of the new covenant, which is shed for many for the forgiveness of sins.”

Here we see that forgiveness is not cheap — it cost Messiah His very life. But we must also understand that forgiveness does not mean the removal of justice.

Forgiveness and Justice

Forgiveness does not mean ignoring justice. יהוה is both merciful and just, as Psalm 89:14 declares:

“Righteousness and right-ruling are the foundation of Your throne; loving-kindness and truth go before Your face.”

Romans 12:19 instructs us:

“Beloved, do not revenge yourselves, but give place to the wrath, for it has been written, ‘Vengeance is Mine, I will repay,’ says יהוה.”

Forgiveness releases our personal bitterness, but it doesn’t erase the need for lawful accountability or righteous restitution. This is why in Luke 19:8, Zacchaeus responded to Messiah’s grace by making tangible restitution:

“But Zakkai stood up and said to the Master, “Look, Master, I give half of my possessions to the poor. And if I have taken whatever from anyone by false accusation, I repay fourfold.””

As David neared the end of his life, he charged Solomon to deal with the wrongs committed by Joab and Shimei (1 Kings 2:5–9). Scripture does not tell us the state of David’s heart toward them, but what is clear is that their actions — acts of bloodshed and rebellion — carried serious consequences under Torah. Even where mercy had once been extended, justice still had to be upheld. This serves as a reminder that forgiveness, when it is present, does not necessarily remove the need for righteous judgment.

A modern example of this distinction can be seen when someone forgives a person who has committed a terrible crime — such as the murder of a family member — yet justice is still carried out through the legal system. In some cases, family members have publicly extended forgiveness to the offender, even praying for them, while still supporting the lawful penalty, including the death sentence. The personal act of forgiveness releases the offender from bitterness in the heart, while the legal process upholds justice and societal order.

Forgiveness is the heart’s release; justice is the restoration of what is right — and that restoration often comes at a cost.

The Cost of Forgiveness

Forgiveness is never without cost. Someone always bears the weight of the wrong. It may mean letting go of our pride, our right to retribution, or even our sense of fairness. In the life of David, יהוה forgave his sin after the incident with Bathsheba, yet Nathan the prophet told him that consequences would still come (2 Samuel 12:13–14):

“And David said to Nathan, “I have sinned against יהוה.” And Nathan said to David, “Also יהוה has put away your sin — you shall not die. However, because by this deed you have greatly scorned יהוה, the child also who is born to you shall certainly die.””

In this example, forgiveness did not erase the reality of the wrong or its effects — David was spared the full penalty, but the cost was still felt. This principle runs throughout Scripture: forgiveness is real, but it is never “free.” Forgiveness does not usurp justice; rather, it works alongside it. In יהוה’s dealings with His people, mercy and justice are never in conflict. His forgiveness removes the eternal penalty of sin, while His justice ensures that righteousness and truth are upheld — a harmony beautifully pictured in Psalm 85:10.

The highest expression of this truth is seen in Messiah, who bore the ultimate cost — His own blood — so that our sins could be forgiven. Isaiah 53:5 reminds us:

“But He was pierced for our transgressions, He was crushed for our crookednesses. The chastisement for our peace was upon Him, and by His stripes we are healed.”

This willingness to bear the cost — an act of self-sacrifice foreshadowing that of Messiah — is also seen in Moses, who pleaded on behalf of Israel for their forgiveness, saying:

“Yet now, if You will forgive their sin — but if not, please blot me out of Your book that You have written.” — Exodus 32:32

In the same spirit, Sha’ul (Paul) calls believers to reflect Messiah’s forgiveness in their own lives. He writes in Colossians 3:12–14:

“Therefore, as chosen ones of Aluhym, set-apart and beloved, put on compassion, kindness, humbleness of mind, meekness, patience, bearing with one another, and forgiving each other if anyone has a complaint against another, indeed, as Messiah forgave you so also should you. But above all these put on love, which is a bond of the perfection.”

Here we see the beautiful character traits that accompany true forgiveness. Such forgiveness requires depth of heart and a willingness to love beyond offence. Psalm 86:5 describes יהוה as the perfect example of this disposition:

“For You, יהוה, are good, and ready to forgive, and great in kindness to all those who call upon You.”

Messiah Himself warns that receiving forgiveness from יהוה is inseparably linked to our willingness to forgive others. Matthew 6:14–15 says:

“For if you forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father shall also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their trespasses, neither shall your Father forgive your trespasses.”

This solemn warning is echoed again in Mark 11:25–26:

“And whenever you stand praying, if you hold whatever against anyone, forgive, so that your Father in the heavens shall also forgive you your trespasses. But if you do not forgive, neither shall your Father in the heavens forgive your trespasses.”

Messiah’s words reveal that forgiveness is not an optional extra in the life of a believer — it is a non-negotiable mark of those who have truly received mercy. If we withhold forgiveness from others, we are in effect denying the reality of the forgiveness we claim to have received from יהוה. Unforgiveness places us in direct contradiction to the grace we depend on, hardening our hearts and closing us off from the flow of His mercy. To be forgiven yet refuse to forgive is to misrepresent His character to the world and to live out of step with His kingdom.

This is the very danger Messiah illustrates in the parable of the unforgiving servant (Matthew 18:21–35). Kepha (Peter) came to Him and asked:

“Master, how often shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? Up to seven times?”יהושוע said to him, “I do not say to you, up to seven times, but up to seventy times seven.”

He then told of a sovereign who wished to settle accounts with his servants. One was brought to him who owed ten thousand talents — an impossible debt. Unable to pay, he and his family were to be sold. In desperation, the servant pleaded for patience, and the master, moved with compassion, released him and forgave the debt entirely. But that same servant went out, found a fellow servant who owed him only a hundred pieces of silver, and violently demanded repayment. The fellow servant begged for patience with the very same words, but he refused and had him thrown into prison. When the master heard, he was enraged:

“Wicked servant! I forgave you all that debt because you begged me. Should you not also have had compassion on your fellow servant, as I had compassion on you?”

The master then delivered him to the torturers until he repaid all that was due. Messiah concluded:

“So also My heavenly Father shall do to you if each of you, from his heart, does not forgive his brother his trespasses.”

The parable shows that there should be no limit on our willingness to forgive: the sovereign represents Aluhym, and we are the servant indebted to Him with an impossible debt — our sin. Upon our pleading, He shows compassion, forgives us, and releases us entirely from that debt. The message is clear: the magnitude of our sin against יהוה far outweighs any offence committed against us. When others sin against us, their offence is nothing in comparison to what He has forgiven us. If we have been shown such immeasurable mercy, how can we justly withhold forgiveness from others? We cannot. And as Messiah emphasised, this forgiveness must be “from the heart” — genuine and sincere, not merely an outward or verbal concession.

The Ongoing Nature of Forgiveness

Forgiveness is not always a single event — it can be an ongoing process. There are times when we forgive in obedience, but the wound is deep enough that feelings resurface later. In those moments, we must reaffirm the decision to forgive. This is perhaps part of what Messiah meant in Matthew 18:22 when He said: “I do not say to you, up to seven times, but up to seventy times seven.” It’s not merely about counting offences but about repeatedly choosing grace over bitterness whenever the memory of the wrong arises. Philippians 3:13–14 encourages this forward-looking posture: 

“Brothers, I do not count myself to have laid hold of it yet, but only this: forgetting what is behind and reaching forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the high calling of Aluhym in Messiah יהושוע.”

Messiah even built this principle of forgiveness into the prayer He taught His disciples:

“‘And forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors.’” — Matthew 6:12

This is a daily reminder that our reception of יהוה’s forgiveness is inseparably linked to our extension of forgiveness to others.

This truth was not only taught by Messiah — He lived it to the fullest. Even in the midst of His crucifixion, יהושוע demonstrated this heart of forgiveness in the face of betrayal and injustice, when He uttered the words:

“Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they do.”

We see this same spirit reflected in Stephen’s martyrdom in Acts 7:59–60:

“And they were stoning Stephanos as he was calling and saying, ‘Master יהושוע, receive my spirit.’ And kneeling down he cried out with a loud voice, ‘Master, do not hold this sin against them.’ And having said this, he fell asleep.”

Stephen’s final words closely echo those of Messiah, showing a heart that interceded for his enemies and chose mercy over retaliation — even at the moment of death.

Such forgiveness not only reflects the heart of  יהוה — it also breaks the enemy’s grip.

Forgiveness as Spiritual Warfare and Community Health

When we refuse to forgive, we give the enemy an opening to work in our lives. Sha’ul warns in Ephesians 4:26–27:

“Be wroth, but do not sin. Do not let the sun go down on your rage, nor give place to the devil.”

Unforgiveness creates a foothold for bitterness, revenge, and division. Forgiveness, on the other hand, is a weapon of spiritual warfare — breaking generational cycles of resentment and shutting the door to the adversary’s schemes. As Sha’ul writes in 2 Corinthians 2:10–11:

“And whom you forgive any matter, I do also. For indeed if I have forgiven any matter, I have forgiven that one for your sakes in the presence of Messiah, lest Satan should take advantage of us, for we are not ignorant of his thoughts.”

This battle is not fought in isolation. Forgiveness also has a vital role in maintaining unity within the body of Messiah. Unforgiveness spreads like a root of bitterness, affecting not only individuals but entire assemblies. Hebrews 12:14–15 warns:

“Pursue peace with all, and pursue apartness without which no one shall see the Master, looking diligently lest anyone fall short of the favour of Aluhym, lest any root of bitterness springing up cause trouble, by which many become defiled.”

Sha’ul urged the believers in Corinth to restore fellowship with the repentant, so that Satan would not gain an advantage over them:

“You should rather forgive and comfort him, lest somehow such a one be swallowed up with too much sadness. So I appeal to you to confirm your love to him.” — 2 Corinthians 2:7–8

When forgiveness flows in the community, the testimony of Messiah shines before the world, fulfilling His prayer in John 17:21 for His followers to be one.

Sha’ul understood that unforgiveness is not only a relational problem — it is a spiritual vulnerability. When we choose to forgive, we are not excusing sin but disarming one of the enemy’s most effective weapons against our hearts, our relationships, and our assemblies.

Yet even after choosing to forgive, many still wrestle with the temptation to hold on to the memory of the wrong — a struggle often summed up in the phrase, “I’ll forgive but I won’t forget.” Scripture tells us that “love… keeps no record of wrongs” (1 Corinthians 13:5). While someone may claim to forgive, holding onto the memory of the offence can indicate that forgiveness has not truly taken place. True forgiveness involves releasing feelings of resentment and letting go of the desire for revenge or retribution. By clinging to the memory of the offence, one may continue to harbour negative feelings toward the offender, undermining the spirit of forgiveness. Remembering such past offences can perpetuate feelings of hurt, anger, and resentment, hindering the healing process for both parties involved.

It can prevent reconciliation and hinder the restoration of trust and harmony in relationships. Holding onto grudges can also contribute to ongoing conflict and tension, further damaging the relationship. Such a mindset can leave the door open for future conflicts and misunderstandings. By keeping a mental tally of past offences, individuals may be more likely to perceive new actions or behaviours as further evidence of wrongdoing, perpetuating a cycle of resentment and mistrust.

This refusal to forget past offences can serve as a barrier to personal growth and development. By dwelling on past hurts, individuals may remain stuck in a cycle of bitterness and negativity, preventing them from moving forward and experiencing personal transformation. Forgiveness requires a willingness to let go of the past and embrace the possibility of a better future.

Overall, while it is understandable that some may struggle to forget past hurts, it is important to recognise that true forgiveness involves both letting go of resentment and releasing the memory of the offence. By striving to truly forgive and forget, individuals can experience greater peace, healing, and reconciliation in their relationships.

With this in mind, it is helpful to hear how others have addressed the tension between forgiving and forgetting. Julianne Stanz, in her article titled ‘Forgive and forget? What do the Scriptures say?,’ writes the following:

“It’s important to know that the phrase “forgive and forget” is not found in the Bible. Forgiving someone does not mean that we ignore what happened and how it affected us. Or that we wholeheartedly restore trust, especially when it would be unwise, imprudent or unsafe to do so. We are not asked to delete painful and harmful experiences from our memory, since remembering the pain of past hurts can help us to choose more wisely and to avoid occasions where we may be hurt unnecessarily.

If the phrase “forgive and forget” means that you move on with your life for the sake of the love you have for Christ and others, that is a great step toward healing the wounds caused by the offence. But if it means that you pretend that the hurt never happened, that would be unwise.”

Having read this, and having considered the argument in defence of forgiving but not forgetting, we can certainly say that context can be key. Ultimately, this subject is complicated and nuanced.

A Scriptural Protocol for Forgiveness

Here is a good opportunity to turn this topic on its head. I am not suggesting that we should be anything less than ready and willing to forgive — or even to forget — but I will propose that Scripture presents a protocol to follow when someone has wronged another, so that the fullness of forgiveness can truly come to pass.

Let’s begin with Exodus 22:1:

“When a man steals an ox or a sheep, and shall slaughter it or sell it, he repays five cattle for an ox and four sheep for a sheep.”

Here we see the principle of restitution — a reparation made to the one who was wronged. The compensation is not equal to the loss, but greater, serving both as a deterrent and as a means of repairing the damage done. It shows us that when someone has wronged another, it is necessary for the offender to give something of himself to make amends. The wrong cannot simply be “forgotten”; restitution must be made.

With that said, in other situations, restitution or making amends may be as simple as offering a sincere apology. An apology, when genuine, can go a long way toward repairing a damaged relationship. As Kevin Hancock writes in ‘Not For Sale: Finding Center in the Land of Crazy Horse’:

“Apologies aren't meant to change the past, they are meant to change the future.”

A true apology signals a commitment to strive not to repeat the same offence. Yet this is a common problem today — many will apologise without sincerity and then continue in the same wrong. A genuine apology requires both an honest acknowledgment of wrongdoing and the humility to change — qualities that open the door to reconciliation and restoration.

Messiah affirms this principle in Matthew 5:23–24:

“If, then, you bring your gift to the altar, and there remember that your brother holds whatever against you, leave your gift there before the altar, and go, first make peace with your brother, and then come and offer your gift.”

Here we see that wrongdoers are not to ignore their offences but to actively make peace with those they have wronged.

This same principle applies to our relationship with Aluhym. 1 John 1:9 tells us:

“If we confess our sins, He is trustworthy and righteous to forgive us the sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness.”

Psalm 32:5 echoes the same truth:

“I acknowledged my sin to You, And my crookedness I did not hide. I have said, ‘I confess my transgressions to יהוה,’ And You forgave the crookedness of my sin. Selah.”

Forgiveness is tied to confession and repentance. Isaiah 55:6–7 puts it this way:

“Seek יהוה while He is to be found, call on Him while He is near. Let the wrong forsake his way, and the unrighteous man his thoughts. Let him return to יהוה, who has compassion on him, and to our Aluhym, for He pardons much.”

And 2 Chronicles 7:14 confirms יהוה’s readiness to forgive when His people humble themselves and repent:

“And My people upon whom My Name is called, shall humble themselves, and pray and seek My face, and turn from their evil ways, then I shall hear from the heavens, and forgive their sin and heal their land.”

All of these passages show that forgiveness is often connected to the wrongdoer’s willingness to acknowledge their offence, turn from it, and — where possible — make restitution. In Scripture, repentance is not merely an inward feeling but is demonstrated through confession, a pledge to change, and concrete actions that repair the wrong where possible. This may take the form of returning what was taken, restoring what was damaged, or humbly seeking reconciliation. This pattern reveals that the fullness of forgiveness, whether between people or with יהוה, is tied to both a sincere acknowledgment of wrong and a genuine commitment to live differently going forward.

Leviticus 4:35 illustrates this process under the Torah:

“Then he removes all its fat, as the fat of the lamb is removed from the slaughtering of the peace offering. And the priest shall burn it on the altar, according to the offerings made by fire to יהוה. So the priest shall make atonement for his sin that he has sinned, and it shall be forgiven him.”

Here, forgiveness was tied to confession, turning from sin, and bringing an offering for atonement. Only through this process could the offender be forgiven and restored. Therefore, when we sin against Aluhym, it is imperative to confess our sin, turn from it, and bring a sacrifice through which the priest would make atonement, so that forgiveness could be received. The forgiveness of the Father is there, but until we come to Him, it cannot be applied.

We see this same truth in the parable of the prodigal son in Luke 15:21–22:

“And the son said to him, ‘Father, I have sinned against the heaven, and before you, and I am no longer worthy to be called your son.’ But the father said to his servants, ‘Bring out the best robe and put it on him, and put a ring on his hand and sandals on his feet.’”

Just as the prodigal son sought forgiveness from his father and was embraced with love and acceptance, so too must we humble ourselves before Aluhym and return to Him to receive His forgiveness.

Similarly, when we wrong others — or are wronged — the person at fault must repent, confess, and make restitution. All of this requires sacrifice, and sacrifice requires humility. We see this in Luke 17:3–4:

“Take heed to yourselves. If your brother sins against you, rebuke him, and if he repents, forgive him. And if he sins against you seven times in a day, and seven times in a day comes back to you, saying, ‘I repent,’ you shall forgive him.”

Again, I am not saying that we should hold on to ill feelings, refuse to release them to the Father, or fail to be ready and willing to forgive. We are called to forgive. Proverbs 19:11 tells us:

“A man’s discretion makes him patient, and his adorning is to pass over a transgression.”

However, the completeness of forgiveness is achieved when the offender makes peace with his brother.

This is something for us to meditate on.

When the steps of reparation have been taken, and reconciliation is sought by the offender, yet they are met with a hardened heart unwilling to forgive, it is a great travesty. Such a response is not an expression of love, nor is it conducive to peace. Unforgiveness carries profound consequences that can affect individuals mentally, emotionally, physically, and spiritually.

This is why it is not enough to simply understand the process of forgiveness — we must also grasp why forgiveness is so important. When we see the power it holds to heal, restore, and transform, we will be more eager to walk in it ourselves.

Why Is It Important To Forgive?

Forgiveness is not simply a moral ideal — it is a transformative force with the power to change individuals, restore relationships, and strengthen communities.

1. Emotional healing

Forgiveness releases the burden of anger, resentment, and bitterness that can weigh heavily on the heart and mind. By letting go of past hurts and grievances, we open the door to emotional healing and find relief from the pain and suffering caused by holding onto negative emotions.

2. Personal growth

Choosing to forgive opens the door to personal growth and self-improvement. It cultivates qualities such as empathy, compassion, and resilience, allowing us to learn from past experiences, grow in maturity, and develop a deeper understanding of others — enabling us to walk in greater wisdom and grace, showing kindness, patience, and forgiveness.

3. Restoration of relationships

Forgiveness is foundational for repairing relationships damaged by conflict, betrayal, or misunderstanding. It creates an opportunity for reconciliation, healing, and rebuilding trust. Through forgiveness, relationships can be renewed, strengthened, and deepened — bringing harmony not only between individuals but also within communities and society as a whole.

4. Mental and physical health

Research shows that forgiveness brings numerous mental and physical health benefits. Letting go of resentment and bitterness can reduce stress, anxiety, and depression, while increasing happiness and overall well-being. It has also been linked to lower blood pressure, a reduced risk of heart disease, and enhanced immune function — underscoring its powerful impact on both mind and body. 

In an article titled Forgiveness: Your Health Depends on It by Johns Hopkins Medicine, the following is noted:

“Whether it’s a simple spat with your spouse or long-held resentment toward a family member or friend, unresolved conflict can go deeper than you may realize — it may be affecting your physical health. The good news: Studies have found that the act of forgiveness can reap huge rewards for your health, lowering the risk of heart attack; improving cholesterol levels and sleep; and reducing pain, blood pressure, and levels of anxiety, depression and stress. And research points to an increase in the forgiveness-health connection as you age.”

Similarly, an empirical study published in the Journal of Religion and Health in 2022, titled Indirect Effects of Forgiveness on Psychological Health Through Anger and Hope: A Parallel Mediation Analysis, explains:

“The evidence for the relationships between forgiveness, anger, hope, and psychological well-being is undeniable according to the current state of forgiveness literature (see for example, Wade et al., 2014). However, by showing that forgivers experience greater psychological health (lower anxiety and depression and greater self-esteem) indirectly through reduced anger and improved hope for the future, this study provided empirical evidence for the underlying mechanisms of the forgiveness health link. This finding allows researchers and clinicians to have greater confidence in making the claim that forgiveness reduces anger and restores hope, leading to greater health. Unforgiveness may continue to entrap victims in emotional prison, but forgiveness not only helps victims overcome anger but also helps them find freedom to explore new possibilities for the better future. The restoration of freedom seems to be one of the paradoxes of forgiveness that forgivers experience when they make a courageous decision to let go of the past and move on (Enright, 2001).”

5. Spiritual fulfilment

Forgiveness aligns us with the heart of יהוה, reflecting His compassion, grace, and love. It is a deeply spiritual practice that keeps us in step with the mercy we have received, fostering peace, purpose, and closeness with Him. By extending forgiveness to others, we not only walk in obedience to His Word but also experience spiritual fulfilment, alignment with our values, and a greater connection to something larger than ourselves.

Overall, forgiveness is essential for promoting emotional healing, fostering personal growth, restoring relationships, improving mental and physical health, and nurturing spiritual fulfilment. By choosing to forgive, individuals can experience greater peace, happiness, and fulfilment in their lives, both for themselves and for those around them.

Just as we are called to forgive others without limit, we must also learn to accept יהוה’s forgiveness for ourselves. The grace we extend outward is often shaped by the grace we have truly received inward — and when we walk in both, we reflect the fullness of His mercy to the world.

Self-Forgiveness

Self-forgiveness is a profound and essential aspect of personal growth and healing. It involves acknowledging and accepting one’s mistakes, shortcomings, and past wrongdoings, while granting oneself compassion, understanding, and grace. It is not about excusing or condoning harmful behaviour, but about releasing oneself from the burden of guilt, shame, and self-blame. This requires a willingness to confront and take responsibility for one’s actions, whilst recognising that everyone is fallible and capable of making mistakes. As it says in Romans 3:23 — “for all have sinned and fall short of the esteem of Aluhym.”

From a Christian perspective, self-forgiveness encompasses the recognition of one’s inherent worth and dignity as a child of Aluhym, despite past failures. It begins with acknowledging the reality of sin and its consequences, whilst embracing the transformative power of יהוה’s Word. Central to our belief is the understanding that forgiveness is available to all who seek it — including ourselves. Just as יהוה extends forgiveness to humanity through the sacrifice of יהושוע the Messiah, we are called to extend that same forgiveness to ourselves — remembering the command in Leviticus 19:18 to “love your neighbour as yourself.”

Biblical self-love is not selfishness or pride; it is a humble, godly care for one’s own soul, lived in alignment with יהוה’s will. If we are called to love others well, we must also walk in love toward ourselves — which includes releasing ourselves from guilt through genuine repentance and acceptance of יהוה’s forgiveness. This repentance is not merely an inward feeling but is demonstrated through confession, a sincere turning away from sin, and a renewed commitment to live in obedience. When we are at peace with ourselves in this way, we are far better equipped to extend grace to others — for those who have truly received and embraced forgiveness are the ones most able to freely give it. As Messiah said in Luke 7:47, “Her many sins have been forgiven — as her great love has shown. But whoever has been forgiven little loves little.”

Self-forgiveness requires humility to admit faults, faith in יהוה’s power to redeem, and perseverance to walk in transformation. Through prayer, reflection, and guidance from Scripture, we can find the strength to release guilt, shame, and self-condemnation, experiencing healing and restoration, and moving forward with renewed faith, hope, and confidence in His love.

However, self-forgiveness does not mean ignoring or excusing sin. Rather, it is about facing the truth of our actions, repenting, and committing to ongoing growth, reconciliation, and godly living. Failure to forgive oneself can lead to spiritual stagnation, hinder intimacy with יהוה, and even result in emotional, psychological, or physical distress.

Dr W. Lee Cowden, M.D., M.D.(H), the Chairman of the Scientific Advisory Board and Professor of the Academy of Comprehensive Integrative Medicine, explains:

"Forgive yourself and others. One of the most common things that I see mentally and emotionally in patients that have cancer and other chronic disease is unforgiveness towards self, and then secondarily towards others. So, a lot of people say, ‘Well, what they did to me is not forgivable.’ I say, ‘Okay, well if you hold onto the anger are you hurting them?’ ‘No.’ I say, ‘If you hold onto the anger, are you hurting you?’ ‘Yes.’ ‘Well, when do you want to stop hurting you?’ That’s what it comes down to.”

Forgiveness and Love

At the very heart of forgiveness is love — the kind of love that is not mere sentiment, but is expressed through action. Sha’ul tells us in 1 Corinthians 13:5 that love:

“…does not behave indecently, does not seek its own, is not provoked, reckons not the evil.”

And in verse 7:

“…it covers all, believes all, expects all, endures all.”

Forgiveness is love in action — the same love Messiah spoke of in John 15:12–13:

“This is My command, that you love one another as I have loved you. No one has greater love than this: that one should lay down his life for his friends.”

When we forgive, we reflect the very nature of יהוה, whose love keeps no record of wrongs and whose mercy triumphs over judgment (James 2:13).

Conclusion

As followers of Messiah, it is incumbent upon us to embody forgiveness in our daily lives. We are called to forgive as we have been forgiven, extending grace and compassion to others. As we conclude our reflections on forgiveness, let us remember the words of יהושוע in Matthew 6:14:

“For if you forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father shall also forgive you.”

May we be vessels of יהוה's love, mercy, and grace in a world in need of healing and reconciliation.

Selah: Psalm 32:1 — “Blessed is he whose transgression is forgiven, whose sin is covered.”

May יהוה be with you and bless you.