Fornication and the Faithful: A Biblical Call to Sexual Purity

Sex—and the powerful desire for it—has long been a stumbling block for countless individuals, including many prominent figures in Scripture. The Bible contains sobering warnings and tragic examples of those who yielded to sexual temptation. The Israelites, for instance, fell into sin at Baʿal Peor, engaging in immorality with Moabite women and ultimately worshipping their gods, provoking the wrath of יהוה (Numbers 25). Samson, driven by his desire for a Philistine woman—against the better judgment of his parents and contrary to יהוה’s commands—was led into betrayal and captivity, ultimately losing his strength and his sight (Judges 16). King David, overcome with lust for another man’s wife, Bathsheba, committed both adultery and murder, and as a result, suffered the loss of his child and ongoing strife within his household (2 Samuel 11–12). Solomon, though blessed with unparalleled wisdom, was ensnared by his love for women. He amassed hundreds of wives and concubines, including foreign women who turned his heart toward idolatry, drawing him away from יהוה (1 Kings 11).

These are not mere historical accounts—they are divine warnings. They reveal how unchecked desire, when removed from the boundaries יהוה has established, can bring down even the most powerful and gifted individuals.

In today’s culture, the sacredness of sex has been almost entirely stripped away. It is used as a marketing device, exploited in advertising to arouse desire and sell everything from cars to clothing. The pornography industry flourishes—driven by lust, secrecy, and addiction. Casual sex is not only normalised but actively encouraged, with hookup culture celebrated as liberating rather than destructive. One-night stands are commonplace, and apps like Tinder exist for the sole purpose of facilitating such encounters. What was once seen as the consummation of a holy covenant—the merging of two souls into one—is now treated as a casual, transactional act, no more significant than a handshake or a hug.

The reverence once associated with sexual intimacy has been replaced by indifference and, in many cases, open disdain for restraint and holiness. For some, sexual conquest has become a goal, even a source of public acclaim. People openly boast about sleeping with dozens—or even hundreds—of partners, sometimes in a single day, turning what is sacred into entertainment and profit.

So we are left to ask: is sex something trivial, or is it something sacred? Is it merely a fleeting pleasure, or a divine gift designed to reflect something far greater—a covenant of love, faithfulness, and spiritual unity?

Sexual immorality takes many forms, but in this article, our focus will be on fornication—that is, sexual activity before or outside of marriage. What does the Word of יהוה say about this? Why is it clearly prohibited? And how should we, as believers, respond in a world that not only normalises fornication but often celebrates it? We will explore these questions through the lens of Scripture, seeking both truth and a deeper understanding of how we can honour and glorify our Father in heaven with our bodies, our choices, and our lives.

It’s important to note that this article is not written to condemn anyone. I, too, have sadly fallen prey to this sin, and I speak not from a place of judgment, but from one of experience, repentance, and a sincere desire to see others spared from the same pain and consequences. Sexual sin carries very real and lasting repercussions—spiritually, emotionally, and relationally. My hope is that through this reflection on Scripture, we as the body of Messiah may be edified, corrected in love, and strengthened to walk in holiness, honouring יהוה with every part of our lives.

The Benefits of Sex

Sex is a significant part of the human experience, offering a wide variety of benefits:

Firstly, sex fosters a unique form of intimacy and connection between partners. Through physical touch, shared vulnerability, and mutual pleasure, individuals forge deeper emotional bonds, enhancing their relationships and overall well-being. It serves as a powerful means of expressing love, affection, and desire, strengthening the foundation of a romantic partnership.

Secondly, engaging in sexual activity triggers the release of endorphins, oxytocin, and other feel-good hormones in the brain, promoting relaxation, reducing stress levels, and lifting mood. Regular sexual activity has been linked to lower rates of depression and anxiety, highlighting its role in supporting mental health. Furthermore, sex is a form of exercise and can improve cardiovascular health, boost immunity, and even contribute to better sleep quality. Additionally, the release of certain hormones during sex can alleviate pain, while the pleasure derived from sex heightens sensory awareness, ignites desire, and brings joy and fulfilment to individuals. Embracing pleasure as a natural and healthy part of life can, in turn, enhance overall happiness and well-being.

Thirdly, beyond romantic partnerships, sex plays a role in bonding within families as it can strengthen the bond between parents and facilitates parent-child attachment, the benefits of which can extend to the social cohesion of communities.

Finally, sex serves as the primary means of reproduction, ensuring the continuation of genetic material and the diversity of the gene pool. While not everyone engages in sexual activity for the purpose of reproduction, its significance in this regard cannot be overstated.

How Modern Society Views Sex

In today's society, there is a noticeable disregard for the sanctity of sex, a trend that reflects broader shifts in cultural attitudes and values. While sex has historically been viewed as a sacred and intimate act, cherished within the context of committed relationships and marriage, contemporary norms often prioritise individual pleasure and instant gratification over considerations of moral or spiritual significance.

One contributing factor to this disregard for the sanctity of sex is the prevalence of secularism and a decline in traditional religious beliefs and values. As organised religion wanes in influence, moral frameworks that once guided societal attitudes toward sex are increasingly questioned or abandoned, leading to a more permissive and relativistic approach to sexual ethics.

In addition, advances in technology and media have made explicit sexual content widely accessible, contributing to the normalisation and desensitisation of sexual imagery and behaviour. Many television programs and streaming series, such as those on Netflix, often portray sex as trivial—something that naturally occurs while dating or even as a casual one-night stand. A perfect example of this is Joey, a character from the hugely popular sitcom Friends, who is depicted as having numerous sexual partners, with this portrayed as both humorous and normal. Even other characters, who are shown to be more serious about relationships, frequently engage in sex outside of marriage with multiple partners. The pornography industry also reinforces unrealistic and harmful narratives about sex, promoting objectification, exploitation, and the commodification of intimacy.

Moreover, the growing and predominant influence of social media in our society today has fuelled a cultural environment in which sexually charged imagery—bordering on soft-core pornography—has become commonplace. The competitive drive for views, likes, and engagement rewards provocative visuals, making such content a powerful tool for attracting attention. Even influencers who are not directly involved in the pornography industry often use their scantily clothed bodies to draw in audiences and boost their popularity. This is done knowingly, as many are well aware that the famous saying holds true: “Sex sells.” And indeed, this reality continues to shape much of our culture’s messaging about intimacy, desire, and human worth.

Shifting social norms and attitudes toward marriage, family, and gender roles have also influenced perceptions of sex and relationships. The rise of individualism, coupled with economic and cultural factors, has led to delayed marriage, increased cohabitation, and a greater acceptance of non-traditional relationship structures, challenging traditional notions of sexual morality and commitment.

In this context, the sanctity of sex is often overshadowed by societal pressures, personal desires, and external influences that prioritise immediate pleasure and personal fulfilment over deeper values and spiritual considerations.

What the Scriptures Say About Sex Outside of Marriage

The Scriptures repeatedly warn against sex before or outside of marriage, using terms such as fornication, whoring, and sexual immorality to describe such behaviour. These are not vague—they are consistently linked to spiritual unfaithfulness, idolatry, and divine displeasure. Below are examples of how this is addressed in the Word of יהוה.

In the Tanakh (Old Testament), sexual immorality is often highlighted in the context of adultery. The Seventh Commandment plainly states:

Exodus 20:14 —“You do not commit adultery”

This refers to engaging in sexual relations with someone other than one's spouse or with a person who is already married. However, Scripture also addresses sex before or outside of marriage, even when not involving a married individual.

One striking example is found in:

Numbers 25:1–4 — “And Yisra’ĕl dwelt in Shittim, and the people began to whore with the daughters of Mo’aḇ. And they invited the people to the slaughterings of their mighty ones, and the people ate and bowed down to their mighty ones. Thus Yisra’ĕl was joined to Ba‛al Pe‛or, and the displeasure of יהוה burned against Yisra’ĕl. And יהוה said to Mosheh, ‘Take all the leaders of the people and hang them up before יהוה, before the sun, so that the burning displeasure of יהוה turns away from Yisra’ĕl.’”

This passage shows that when the Israelites engaged in sexual sin ("whoring") with the daughters of Moab, it quickly led them into idolatry—worshipping foreign mighty ones. Their unfaithfulness in the physical realm mirrored their unfaithfulness in the spiritual, resulting in יהוה’s displeasure and judgment. This teaches us that sexual immorality is not merely a physical act; it has deep spiritual consequences. It can distort our thinking, dull our discernment, and lead us away from the worship of the one true God. The consequences are serious, and the pattern is clear: sexual sin often precedes or accompanies spiritual rebellion.

Next we look at Deuteronomy 22:13-21:

“When any man takes a wife, and shall go in to her, and shall hate her, and shall make abusive charges against her and bring an evil name on her and say, ‘I took this woman, and when I came to her I did not find her a maiden,’ then the father and mother of the young woman shall take and bring out the proof of the girl’s maidenhood to the elders of the city at the gate. “And the girl’s father shall say to the elders, ‘I gave my daughter to this man as wife, and he hates her. ‘And see, he has made abusive charges against her, saying, “I did not find your daughter a maiden,” and yet these are the proofs of my daughter’s maidenhood.’ And they shall spread the garment before the elders of the city. “And the elders of that city shall take that man and punish him, and fine him one hundred pieces of silver and give them to the father of the young woman, because he has brought an evil name on a maiden of Yisra’ĕl. And she is to be his wife, he is not allowed to put her away all his days. “But if the matter is true, that the girl was not found a maiden, then they shall bring out the girl to the door of her father’s house, and the men of her city shall stone her to death with stones, because she has done wickedness in Yisra’ĕl, to whore in her father’s house. Thus you shall purge the evil from your midst.”

These verses in Deuteronomy lay out a solemn and weighty instruction regarding sexual purity before marriage. In this passage, a man who falsely accuses his wife of not being a virgin is punished, while a woman who is proven to have committed sexual immorality and thus lost her virginity before marriage faces the most severe judgment—death. This highlights how seriously יהוה regards chastity and honesty within the covenant of marriage. Though the passage focuses on a woman, the principle of purity applies equally to both men and women. Just as Messiah is returning for a pure, spotless, virgin Bride (2 Corinthians 11:2; Revelation 19:7–8), so too are we to remain virgins for our future spouses. Marriage is not merely a contract; it is a covenant shadowing the union between Messiah and His people.

And whilst there are those of us, me included, who may not have upheld this standard in the part and are sadly not virgins, there is still hope. The past cannot be undone but the present and the future can. Repentance and redemption through יהושוע are available to all. Through Him, we are made new creations (2 Corinthians 5:17), washed clean, and given the strength to walk in righteousness. From this day forward, we can choose to live in purity. We can decide to reserve ourselves for our future spouse, offering them a whole heart and a sanctified body. As it is written, “Choose this day whom you will serve” (Joshua 24:15), and “I have called the heavens and the earth as witnesses today against you: I have set before you life and death, the blessing and the curse. Therefore you shall choose life, so that you live, both you and your seed” (Deuteronomy 30:19). Let us choose life, choose purity, and prepare ourselves as a Bride adorned for her Bridegroom.

Further on in this chapter we see the following verses:

Deuteronomy 22:28-29 — “When a man finds a girl who is a maiden, who is not engaged, and he seizes her and lies with her, and they are found out, then the man who lay with her shall give to the girl’s father fifty pieces of silver, and she is to be his wife because he has humbled her. He is not allowed to put her away all his days.”

This passage is often misunderstood as referring to rape, but a closer examination of the Hebrew reveals otherwise. While verse 25 earlier in the chapter does speak of rape—using language that conveys force and violence—the Hebrew word used in verse 28, often translated “seizes,” is different. Though it can mean to take hold of, it does not inherently imply violence or coercion. The key phrase “and they are found out” also indicates that this was a mutual, consensual act—not a violent one.

In ancient Israel, such an act of premarital sex was not treated lightly. The consequence was not merely financial compensation, but the binding responsibility of marriage. The man was required to pay a bride price and could not divorce her for the rest of his life. This reflected the seriousness with which יהוה views the sexual union—not as something casual or recreational, but as an act that binds two lives together, physically, emotionally, and covenantally.

This law underscored the responsibility that comes with sexual intimacy. Here we observe that when a man and a woman engage in sexual activity outside of marriage, it was expected of them to subsequently formalise their relationship through marriage, with the intent of creating a union that was not meant to end in separation. Therefore, both parties bore a consequence and responsibility to adhere to the will of יהוה by entering into marriage.

In our modern context, this verse reminds us that the Biblical view of sexual intercourse places a high value on covenant, responsibility, and permanence. Sex outside of marriage was not permitted to remain casual or hidden—it demanded action that restored honour and aligned with יהוה’s design for relationships. It stands as a clear example of taking responsibility for one’s actions, ensuring that choices carried the weight of commitment and accountability. It stands as a clear example of taking responsibility for one’s actions, ensuring that choices carried the weight of commitment and accountability. 

Imagine how different our culture would be if people today were required to take such accountability—marrying the person with whom they had engaged in sexual intimacy. Such a standard would greatly reduce the number of people who enter into sex naively and prematurely—when they are not ready, do not truly love the other person, or lack the maturity and responsibility to honour such a union—and, in turn, would spare many from the needless heartache that so often follows.

Next, we look at the words of our Master in Mark 7:20-23:

“And He said, “What comes out of a man, that defiles a man. “For from within, out of the heart of men, proceed evil reasonings, adulteries, whorings, murders, thefts, greedy desires, wickednesses, deceit, indecency, an evil eye, blasphemy, pride, foolishness. “All these wicked matters come from within and defile a man.””

Here, our beloved Messiah clearly teaches that sin originates from within the heart—not merely in external actions, but in the inward desires and thoughts that motivate them. Among the many things He lists as defiling are “adulteries” and “whorings” (translated from Greek μοιχεία (moicheiai, G3430) and πορνεία (porneiai, G4202)), both of which refer to sexual immorality—whether inside or outside the marriage covenant.

This passage strongly affirms that sexual sin is not a trivial matter, it is a defiling action—something that corrupts the soul from within. In naming “whorings” alongside murder, theft, pride, and blasphemy, the Messiah emphasises how serious and spiritually damaging such behaviour is.

Next, we consider the instructions given by the council in Jerusalem to the gentile believers who were turning to the faith:

Acts 15:19-21 - “Therefore I judge that we should not trouble those from among the gentiles who are turning to Aluhym, but that we write to them to abstain from the defilements of idols, and from whoring, and from what is strangled, and from blood.  “For from ancient generations Mosheh has, in every city, those proclaiming him – being read in the congregations every Sabbath.”

At this pivotal moment in early church history, the apostles and elders—under the guidance of (the) Ruach Ha’Qodesh (Holy Spirit)—issue a clear and foundational ruling for gentile converts. Among the first instructions given is a command to abstain from whoring (porneiai, G4202), along with avoiding idolatry, blood, and what is strangled. The apostles’ inclusion of "whoring" as a sin to be immediately forsaken underscores how sexual purity is a non-negotiable aspect of following the Most High, even for those newly entering into the faith from the nations.

Next, we have a strong admonition from Sha’ul (Paul) to the believers in Messiah regarding sexual purity:

1 Thessalonians 4:3–6 — “For this is the desire of Aluhym: your set-apartness – that you should abstain from whoring, that each one of you should know how to possess his own vessel in set-apartness and respect, not in passion of lust, like the nations who do not know Aluhym; not to overstep and take advantage of his brother in this matter, because the Master is the revenger of all such, as we also forewarned you and testified.”

Here, Sha’ul clearly states that the will—or desire—of Aluhym is our set-apartness (holiness). Central to this calling is the command to abstain from whoring. The Greek word used here is porneia (Strong’s G4202), which refers to “illicit sexual intercourse,” including fornication. The King James Version translates it simply as “fornication.” This term encompasses all forms of illicit sexual activity outside the bounds of the covenant relationship יהוה designed between a husband and wife. It includes not only physical acts, but also lustful intent and the objectification of others—both of which Messiah condemned as sin in the heart (Matthew 5:28).

According to Thayer’s Greek Lexicon, porneia is “used a. properly, of illicit sexual intercourse in general.” Similarly, the Cambridge Dictionary defines fornication as “to have sex with someone who you are not married to.”

Instead of yielding to the passions of lust—like the nations who do not know Aluhym—believers are called to possess their bodies ("vessels") in set-apartness and honour. Sha’ul also warns that to overstep these boundaries and take advantage of another in this area is a serious offence. He reminds us that the Master Himself is the avenger of all such acts.

This passage underscores how vital it is for followers of Messiah to live in holiness—not only in belief but in bodily conduct—guarding our hearts and actions in accordance with the will of יהוה.

The next admonition from Sha’ul is found in Ephesians 5:1–11:

“Become, then, imitators of Aluhym as beloved children. And walk in love, as Messiah also has loved us, and gave Himself for us, a gift and an offering to Aluhym for a sweet-smelling fragrance. But whoring and all uncleanness, or greed of gain, let it not even be named among you, as is proper among set-apart ones – neither filthiness, nor foolish talking, nor coarse jesting, which are not fitting, but rather thanksgiving. For this you know, that no one who whores, nor unclean one, nor one greedy of gain, who is an idolater, has any inheritance in the reign of Messiah and Aluhym. Let no one deceive you with empty words, for because of these the wrath of Aluhym comes upon the sons of disobedience. Therefore do not become partakers with them. For you were once darkness, but now you are light in the Master. Walk as children of light – for the fruit of the Spirit is in all goodness, and righteousness, and truth – proving what is well-pleasing to the Master. And have no fellowship with the fruitless works of darkness, but rather reprove them.”

In this passage, Sha’ul urges believers to imitate Aluhym and walk in love, following the example of Messiah, who gave Himself for us as a fragrant offering to Aluhym. He then contrasts this walk of love and holiness with behaviours incompatible with the calling of the set-apart, specifically highlighting sexual immorality (“whoring”), and declaring that such conduct should not even be named among believers.

Sha’ul follows this with a solemn warning: those who persist in sexual immorality have no inheritance in the reign of Messiah and Aluhym. He cautions the faithful not to be deceived by empty words that seek to excuse or minimise such sins, affirming that because of these actions, the wrath of Aluhym comes upon the sons of disobedience.

Therefore, believers are urged not to partner with such people or participate in their ways. Rather, as those who were once darkness but are now light in the Master, we are called to walk as children of light, bearing the fruit of goodness, righteousness, and truth. We are also commanded not only to avoid the fruitless works of darkness but to expose and reprove them.

This passage makes it unmistakably clear: sexual immorality is not merely a private or personal failing—it is a spiritual danger that disqualifies one from the Kingdom and provokes divine judgment. It powerfully underscores the believer’s call to live in holiness, walking in the light, which necessarily includes abstaining from all forms of sexual immorality.

The next passage from Sha’ul is found in Colossians 3:5-7:

“Therefore put to death your members which are on the earth: whoring, uncleanness, passion, evil desire and greed of gain, which is idolatry. Because of these the wrath of Aluhym is coming upon the sons of disobedience, in which you also once walked when you lived in them.”

Here, Sha’ul gives a direct command to put to death the sinful behaviours that stem from our earthly nature, including whoring (sexual immorality). He again affirms that because of such practices, the wrath of Aluhym comes upon the sons of disobedience. This passage reinforces the urgent warning of Ephesians 5:1–11: sexual immorality and related sins have no place among believers and must be wholly renounced. Such practices are fundamentally incompatible with a life set apart for Aluhym and bring one under His righteous judgment.

Next, we look at a passage from Sha’ul in 1 Corinthians 6, which addresses the serious consequences of sexual immorality:

1 Corinthians 6:9–10 — “Do you not know that the unrighteous shall not inherit the reign of Aluhym? Do not be deceived. Neither those who whore, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor homosexuals, nor thieves, nor greedy of gain, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers shall inherit the reign of Aluhym.”

Here, it is stated plainly: those who engage in sexual immorality (whoring) will not inherit the reign of Aluhym. This leaves no room for justification. If we truly desire to inherit the Kingdom, we must turn away from illicit sexual behaviour.

1 Corinthians 6:18 — “Flee whoring. Every sin that a man does is outside the body, but he who commits whoring sins against his own body.”

To better understand this verse, we look at the insights provided by two commentaries:

Gill’s Exposition of the Entire Bible explains:

“Flee fornication, as that which is hurtful, scandalous, and unbecoming of Christians. Avoid it, and all the occasions that may lead to it. Other sins, though committed with the body, typically involve the misuse of things external to it. But fornication is unique—it defiles and dishonours the body itself, often bringing harm to health, strength, and reputation. It is not only committed through the body but against it, degrading what should be a temple for God.”

BibleRef.com Commentary adds:

“In the Greco-Roman, idol-worshiping culture of Paul's day, sex of all kinds had been normalized for nearly everyone. That included prostitution, adultery, pedophilia, homosexuality, and so forth. Growing up in this environment, it's not surprising to think some of the Christians in Corinth had trouble seeing sex outside of marriage as a big deal. Paul has spent this chapter showing why avoiding sexual immorality is so essential for believers.

Now he gives them a strategy for dealing with it: run. He tells them to flee from sexual immorality. Run away like you are escaping from something that might harm you, because it will. Even if the culture despises you for it, it's better to escape from sexual sin than to be conquered by it (Genesis 39:7–12).

Paul shows that sexual immorality is different from other kinds of sin because it's a form of self-harm. We might commit other sins with our bodies, but sexual immorality unites us sinfully with another person. This happens on a deeply physical and spiritual level. We will experience the natural consequences of that sin at that deep level, as well.

It's important to note that Paul did not write that sexual immorality is the worst of all sins, as we sometimes conclude. Instead, he is combatting the casual attitude toward sexual sin carried by some Christians in hyper-sexualized cultures. In addition to hurting others, sexual immorality contributes to our own deep pain. It's no more or less a sin than any other, but human cultures tend to treat it more casually than other errors.”

Together, these commentaries emphasise the uniquely defiling nature of sexual sin. It does not only offend Aluhym—it harms the very vessel He has given us to serve Him with. This further reinforces the call to pursue holiness in both body and spirit.

Further on in his letter to the Corinthians, Sha’ul gives another sobering reminder:

1 Corinthians 10:1-8 — “For I do not wish you to be ignorant, brothers, that all our fathers were under the cloud, and all passed through the sea, and all were immersed into Mosheh in the cloud and in the sea, and all ate the same spiritual food, and all drank the same spiritual drink. For they drank of that spiritual Rock that followed, and the Rock was Messiah. However, with most of them Aluhym was not well pleased, for they were laid low in the wilderness. And these became examples for us, so that we should not lust after evil, as those indeed lusted. And do not become idolaters as some of them, as it has been written, “The people sat down to eat and to drink, and stood up to play.” Neither should we commit whoring, as some of them did, and in one day twenty-three thousand fell”

In this passage, Sha’ul reminds the believers of the history of the children of Yisra’ĕl in the wilderness—those who had experienced great deliverance and provision from Aluhym, yet still fell into sin. Despite being delivered and drinking of the spiritual Rock which symbolised Messiah, many perished because of their disobedience.

He specifically highlights the sin of whoring (sexual immorality), pointing out that twenty-three thousand perished in a single day as a direct consequence. This is not just a historical detail—it is a deliberate warning for us. Sha’ul says these things were written as examples, so that we would not follow in their footsteps by lusting after evil.

This passage reinforces the truth that whoring is not a trivial matter. It carries serious spiritual and physical consequences. Just as it led to the downfall of many in the wilderness, so too can it endanger the believer today if left unchecked. Through this example, we are called to vigilance, repentance, and set-apart living, remembering that Aluhym does not overlook sin, but calls His people to holiness.

In his second letter to the Corinthians, Sha’ul expresses a heartfelt concern:

2 Corinthians 12:20-21 — “For I fear lest, when I come, I do not find you such as I wish, and I be found by you such as you do not wish – lest there be strife, jealousies, outbursts of wrath, selfish ambitions, slander, gossip, puffings up, unrests, and lest, when I come again, my Aluhym should humble me among you, and I shall mourn for many who have sinned before and have not repented of the uncleanness, and whoring, and indecency which they have practised.”

Here, Sha’ul conveys a deep pastoral burden for the Corinthian believers. He fears that, upon his return, he may find some still entangled in sin—specifically mentioning whoring (sexual immorality)—without repentance. His words reveal not only the grievous nature of such sins, but also that repentance is both necessary and expected.

Sha’ul does not treat sexual sin lightly. He speaks of being humbled and grieved before Aluhym on account of those who continue in these behaviours without turning from them. This further affirms the Scriptural stance that whoring is sin and must be repented of if one is to walk rightly with Aluhym.

In his letter to the Galatians, Sha’ul writes:

Galatians 5:16-19 — “And I say: Walk in the Spirit, and you shall not accomplish the lust of the flesh. For the flesh lusts against the Spirit, and the Spirit against the flesh. And these are opposed to each other, so that you do not do what you desire to do. But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under Torah. And the works of the flesh are well-known, which are these: adultery, whoring, uncleanness, indecency”

Galatians 5:24-25 — “And those who are of Messiah have impaled the flesh with its passions and the desires. If we live in the Spirit, let us also walk in the Spirit.”

Here, whoring—often translated as sexual immorality or fornication—is listed among the works of the flesh, clearly marked as behaviour that is incompatible with life in the Spirit. Sha’ul places whoring in the same category as adultery and uncleanness to emphasise how seriously it defiles both body and spirit. 

To “impale the flesh” with its passions is a powerful metaphor, echoing Messiah’s own crucifixion, and it signifies a complete renunciation of sinful desires. It means putting these passions to death—not simply avoiding sinful actions, but allowing the Spirit to transform us inwardly so that the cravings of the old nature no longer rule us. If we belong to Messiah, we are no longer guided by the standards of the world, but by the holiness He calls us to. Walking in the Spirit means guarding our hearts, minds, and bodies—resisting the seductive pull of the culture around us and embracing purity as a living expression of our reverence for יהוה.

Sha’ul expands on this truth in his letter to the Romans:

Romans 8:5-10 — “For those who live according to the flesh set their minds on the matters of the flesh, but those who live according to the Spirit, the matters of the Spirit. For the mind of the flesh is death, but the mind of the Spirit is life and peace. Because the mind of the flesh is enmity towards Aluhym, for it does not subject itself to the Torah of Aluhym, neither indeed is it able, and those who are in the flesh are unable to please Aluhym. But you are not in the flesh but in the Spirit, if indeed the Spirit of Aluhym dwells in you. And if anyone does not have the Spirit of Messiah, this one is not His. And if Messiah is in you, the body is truly dead on account of sin, but the Spirit is life on account of righteousness.”

This passage makes it abundantly clear that living according to the flesh—including engaging in whoring—is living in hostility toward Aluhym. Such a lifestyle is not just spiritually dangerous; it is spiritually dead. It is only through the indwelling of the Spirit that we can overcome the desires of the flesh and live in a manner pleasing to Aluhym. If we truly belong to Messiah, then our lives must reflect His righteousness, not the corrupt works of the flesh.

Next, we turn to the writings of Yahuwchanan (John) in the book of Revelation, where the seriousness of sexual immorality is echoed and its eternal consequences made unmistakably clear.

In Revelation 2:14, Messiah says to the assembly in Pergamos:

“But I hold a few matters against you, because you have there those who adhere to the teaching of Bil‛am, who taught Balaq to put a stumbling-block before the children of Yisra’ĕl, to eat food offered to idols, and to commit whoring.”

One of the matters that Messiah holds against them is the presence of those who engage in whoring, tied to the sin of idolatry—just as Bil‛am caused Yisra’ĕl to stumble in the wilderness. The warning that follows is clear and urgent:

Revelation 2:16 — “Repent, or else I shall come to you speedily and fight against them with the sword of My mouth.”

This warning underscores that whoring is not overlooked by the Master; it is a sin that demands repentance, or judgment will follow.

Later, in Revelation 21:8, the eternal consequences of unrepented of sin are laid out:

“But as for the cowardly, and untrustworthy, and abominable, and murderers, and those who whore, and drug sorcerers, and idolaters, and all the false, their part is in the lake which burns with fire and sulphur, which is the second death.”

And again, in Revelation 22:14–15, the final contrast is drawn between those who do His commands and those who are excluded from the New Jerusalem:

“Blessed are those doing His commands, so that the authority shall be theirs unto the tree of life, and to enter through the gates into the city. But outside are the dogs and those who enchant with drugs, and those who whore, and the murderers, and the idolaters, and all who love and do falsehood.”

These verses from Revelation vividly portray the ultimate end for those who persist in sexual immorality: exclusion from the tree of life and from the set-apart city, and instead, a share in the lake of fire, which is the second death. This is not a temporary consequence, but an eternal one—confirming the Scriptural testimony that whoring is a sin that must be forsaken, repented of, and overcome by those who desire to inherit eternal life.

Before proceeding, it's crucial that we examine the word “harlot” and the concept of “harlotry.” The word harlot can also be used interchangeably with the words “whore” and “prostitute.”

According to the Oxford English Dictionary, the term harlot is defined as follows:

“Chiefly derogatory. A female prostitute; (also) a mistress, a concubine. More generally: a wanton, lascivious, or sexually promiscuous woman. Also as a term of abuse or contempt for a woman.”

In its phrases section, it adds:

“To play the harlot (formerly also†harlots): to behave in a sexually promiscuous manner; to commit adultery, to be unfaithful. Also figurative and in figurative contexts. Now chiefly with reference to biblical usage.”

Clearly, the term carries both literal and figurative weight—especially in Scripture. It can refer to physical sexual immorality as well as spiritual unfaithfulness—that is, turning away from יהוה to pursue idols, false doctrines, or worldly alliances.

The word “harlot’” and interchangeable words are used frequently within the Scriptures. Let us look firstly at Revelation 17:1-6:

“And one of the seven messengers who had the seven bowls came and spoke with me, saying to me, “Come, I shall show you the judgment of the great whore sitting on many waters, with whom the sovereigns of the earth committed whoring, and the inhabitants of the earth were made drunk with the wine of her whoring.” And he carried me away in the Spirit into the wilderness. And I saw a woman sitting on a scarlet beast covered with names of blasphemy, having seven heads and ten horns. And the woman was dressed in purple and scarlet, and adorned with gold and precious stones and pearls, holding in her hand a golden cup filled with abominations and the filthiness of her whoring, and upon her forehead a name written, a secret: BAḆEL THE GREAT, THE MOTHER OF THE WHORES AND OF THE ABOMINATIONS OF THE EARTH. And I saw the woman, drunk with the blood of the set-apart ones, and with the blood of the witnesses of יהושוע. And having seen her, I marvelled – greatly marvelled!”

Here, the “great whore” or harlot is revealed to be a symbolic figure who represents Babel the Great—a metaphor for a corrupt, idolatrous world system that seduces the nations and stands in opposition to יהוה and His people. Throughout the Book of Revelation, Babel the Great symbolises rebellion, spiritual adultery, false religion, unrestrained immorality, and the persecution of the set-apart ones. The imagery is powerful and layered—depicting both spiritual corruption and, very likely, literal immorality as well. The harlot’s cup is full of “abominations and the filthiness of her whoring,” which may include not only idolatry and false worship but also actual physical sexual immorality—actively promoted and spread through her influence—corrupting the nations and drawing them deeper into rebellion against יהוה.

While it is true that the depiction of "whoring" here in Revelation 17 primarily refers to spiritual adultery rather than literal sexual immorality or extramarital sex, it is no coincidence that the language of sexual immorality is used to illustrate the gravity of such rebellion, underscoring the seriousness of figurative and literal sexual immorality and adultery in the eyes of יהוה. Not to mention that one of the evils both promoted and practiced within Babel the Great is likely actual physical sexual immorality and adultery.

Though this imagery speaks primarily to spiritual harlotry—which includes adultery, leaving our Husband יהוה for some strange woman—this pattern is also archetypically played out symbolically in the relationships between husbands and wives. It reflects the covenantal nature of marriage and the expectation of faithfulness within it. Just as spiritual harlotry is a betrayal of our covenant with יהוה, so too is sexual immorality a betrayal of the covenant meant to exist between a husband and wife. Sha’ul explains in Ephesians 5:22–33 that the union between husband and wife is a profound mirror of the relationship between Messiah and the assembly (the church), emphasising the sacredness and exclusivity of this bond. This framing highlights that the ideal relationship—both spiritually and physically—is one of committed union within marriage. It upholds the standard that sexual relations are designed exclusively for the marriage covenant, not for casual or illicit unions between a man and a woman who are not married. In this way, physical purity reflects spiritual fidelity, and both are highly valued in the eyes of יהוה.

In essence, Babel the Great—the “great whore” of Revelation—stands in direct contrast to the Bride of the Lamb. While the Bride is described as a virgin—pure, faithful, and clothed in righteousness—the harlot is a whore—defiled, corrupt, and adorned in luxury and sin. She practices sexual immorality, both spiritual and physical, leading others into corruption and rebellion against יהוה. This stark contrast is intentional, serving as a powerful reminder of the holiness, purity, and faithfulness that יהוה requires of His people.

The word used for “whore” in Revelation 17 is the Greek word πόρνη (pornē, G4204), which carries the following meanings according to Thayer’s Greek Lexicon:

“πόρνη, πόρνης, ἡ (from περάω, πέρνημι, to sell; Curtius, § 358), properly a woman who sells her body for sexual uses (cf. Xenophon, mem. 1, 6, 13), the Sept. for זונָה;

1. properly, a prostitute, a harlot, one who yields herself to defilement for the sake of gain (Aristophanes, Demosthenes, others); in the N. T. universally, any woman indulging in unlawful sexual intercourse, whether for gain or for lust: Matthew 21:31; Luke 15:30; 1 Corinthians 6:15; Hebrews 11:31; James 2:25.

2. Hebraistically (see πορνεία, b. and πορνεύω, 3), metaphorically, an idolatress; so of 'Babylon' i. e. Rome, the chief seat of idolatry: Revelation 17:1, 5, 15; Revelation 19:2.”

It is particularly this universal application of the word that I would like to draw attention to:

“any woman indulging in unlawful sexual intercourse, whether for gain or for lust.”

The one who commits such sexual immorality is referred to as a harlot. While the term is typically applied to a woman, we must understand that we, as believers, are called to be the Bride of Messiah. Therefore, symbolically, we take on the persona of a woman. Both men and women can act like harlots when they commit sexual immorality and thus violate the Word of יהוה. We are not to indulge in unlawful sexual intercourse.

This Greek word is also used in the Septuagint as a translation for the Hebrew root זָנָה (zānâ, H2181). This Hebrew term means "to commit fornication" and can apply to both married and unmarried individuals.

Interestingly, the first occurrence of this word in Scripture is in Genesis 34:31, which says:

“But they said, ‘Should he treat our sister like a whore?’”

This verse concludes the chapter recounting how Sheḵem, son of Ḥamor the Ḥiwwite, slept with Dinah, daughter of Jacob. This act of sexual intimacy occurred outside the bounds of marriage and ultimately resulted in the destruction of Sheḵem, his father, and all the males in their city. Notably, it was only after this incident that Sheḵem sought to marry Dinah. This narrative clearly demonstrates that sexual relations are not trivial and carry serious consequences when conducted outside the covenant of marriage.

For further study, look up this Hebrew word and read the verses where this word is used.

The kind of harlot imagery seen in the book of Revelation is also used in Proverbs 7, which says:

“My son, guard my words, And treasure up my commands with you. Guard my commands and live, And my Torah as the apple of your eye. Bind them on your fingers; Write them on the tablet of your heart. Say to wisdom, “You are my sister,” And call understanding a close friend, To guard you against the strange woman, Against the foreigner who flatters with her words. For at the window of my house I looked through my lattice, And I saw among the simple, I perceived among the youths, A young man lacking heart, Passing through the street near her corner; And he went the way to her house in the twilight, in the evening, In the black and dark night. And look, a woman met him, Dressed like a whore, With a hidden heart. She was boisterous and stubborn, Her feet did not stay at her own house. Now in the street, Now in the square, And at every corner she lurks. And she took hold of him and kissed him; She hardened her face and said to him: “Peace offerings are with me; Today I have paid my vows. “Therefore I came out to meet you, To earnestly seek your face, and I found you. “I have spread my bed with coverings, Coloured linens of Mitsrayim. “I have sprinkled my bed with myrrh, aloes, and cinnamon. “Come, let us take our fill of love until morning; Let us delight ourselves with love. “For my husband is not at home; He has gone on a long journey; “He took a bag of silver with him; He comes home on the day of the new moon.” With her many words she leads him astray, With her smooth lips she seduces him. He goes after her immediately, Like an ox he goes to the slaughter, And as in chains, a fool to the punishment, Till an arrow strikes through his liver; Like a bird rushing into a snare, And did not know it would take his life. And now, listen to me, you children; Pay attention to the words of my mouth: Do not let your heart turn aside to her ways, Do not go astray in her paths. For many are the wounded she has caused to fall, And numerous all her slain ones. Her house is the way to the grave, Going down to the rooms of death.”

Again, this has a spiritual connotation, but it can also apply physically. And whilst it speaks of adultery, it can more broadly warn us not to be enticed by our desires and by someone of the opposite sex to engage in illicit sexual activity. This is sinful and only leads to death.

I also want us to look at the following verse in Proverbs 29:3:

"He who loves wisdom gladdens his father, but a companion of whores destroys wealth.”

Other translations use the word “substance” instead of “wealth.” While this term can certainly be understood in a material sense, it may also point to something far greater than our earthly possessions. It could be referring to the true treasures—the eternal substance—we are to lay up in heaven, as Messiah instructed. 

Rather than being a companion of whores, we are called to love wisdom. In doing so, we not only avoid destruction but bring joy to our Heavenly Father. Wisdom leads to life and blessing, while folly—especially in the form of sexual immorality—leads to ruin and loss, both materially and spiritually.

Finally, the very first mention of sex in the Scriptures—found in Genesis 4:1—presents it within the context of covenantal marriage. As believers in Messiah, we understand that יהוה designed and created sex from the beginning as a beautiful and sacred gift, to be experienced and enjoyed within the bounds of a committed marital relationship between a man and a woman. In this covenant, the couple lovingly enter into a solemn and set-apart union, resulting in complete oneness—a merging into one entity rather than remaining separate individuals.

This is best expressed in Genesis 2:23–25, which says:

“And the man said, ‘This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh. This one is called “woman,” because she was taken out of man.’ For this cause a man shall leave his father and mother, and cleave to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. And they were both naked, the man and his wife, yet they were not ashamed.”

The union between Adam and Eve not only establishes a physical, archetypal pattern for relationships but also serves as a prophetic model—illustrating the intimate relationship between Messiah and His Bride, a bond characterised by sacrificial love, fidelity, and unity. Given the gravity and foundational nature of this pattern, engaging in sexual activity outside of this sacred union distorts the intended design, as revealed from the beginning, and violates both the teachings of Scripture and the commands of יהוה. It is an action by which the adversary seeks to separate us spiritually from our covenantal union with our Husband, יהוה, and to have us joined instead to himself—entangling us in his deception and defilement.

Having seen the Scriptural and covenantal weight of this union, we must also examine the tangible consequences when it is taken outside of יהוה’s design, for such actions carry devastating effects on individuals and society.

The Consequences Of Sex Outside Of Marriage

It is important to remember that יהוה warns His people in Leviticus 26 and Deuteronomy 28—just as He warned Adam in the garden—that disobedience to His commandments brings inevitable repercussions. Scripture calls these “curses,” the outworking of turning away from His ways.

Although sexual intimacy is a gift from יהוה, offering numerous benefits to the human condition, when removed from the sacred boundary He established, it ceases to bring blessing and instead invites harm. This harm can be physiological, psychological, sociological, and spiritual—impacting not only individuals, but also families, communities, and even entire nations.

Sex without constraints—referring to sexual behaviour lacking boundaries, responsibility, or ethical considerations—can indeed have detrimental effects on society. Here are several ways in which unrestricted sexual behaviour can be harmful:

1. Spread of STIs and Unintended Pregnancies:

Engaging in sex without constraints, particularly without the use of protection or contraception, increases the risk of sexually transmitted infections (STIs), diseases (STDs), and unintended pregnancies. This not only poses health risks to individuals but also strains healthcare systems and contributes to public health challenges. For example, the World Health Organization (2016) reports that an estimated 520 million people aged 15–49 years (13%) worldwide have herpes simplex virus type 2 (HSV-2) infection, the main cause of genital herpes. In 2020 alone, there were an estimated 374 million new infections in people aged 15–49 years with one of four curable STIs: chlamydia, gonorrhoea, syphilis, and trichomoniasis.1 Similarly, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (2021) notes that approximately 20 million new STIs occur annually in the United States alone, highlighting the ongoing prevalence and public health concern of these infections.2 Despite advances, antibiotic-resistant strains of STIs such as gonorrhoea have risen globally, worsening the challenge (Rowley et al., 2022).3

Unintended pregnancies lead to a rise in abortion, which is the murder of an unborn life. According to the World Health Organization (2021), 73 million induced abortions take place worldwide each year.4 The Guttmacher Institute adds that roughly 121 million unintended pregnancies occurred each year between 2015 and 2019, and of these unintended pregnancies, 61% ended in abortion—translating to 73 million abortions per year (Bearak et al., 2020).5 The United Nations Population Fund (2019) also emphasises that unintended pregnancies contribute to poor health outcomes and unsafe abortion practices worldwide.6

2. Emotional and Psychological Consequences:

Sex creates bonds biologically through a complex interplay of hormones and neurotransmitters released during sexual activity. One key hormone involved in bonding is oxytocin—often referred to as the “love hormone” or “bonding hormone.” Oxytocin is released during moments of intimacy, including sexual intercourse, and plays a crucial role in forming emotional connections and bonds between individuals. It fosters feelings of trust, attachment, and intimacy, promoting a sense of closeness and connection with one’s partner (Smith & Wang, 2020).7 Additionally, other neurochemicals—such as dopamine, which is linked to reward and motivation, and serotonin, which influences mood and emotional regulation—are released during sexual activity (Pfaus, 2009), while endorphins, the body’s natural opioids, are also released and promote relaxation and well-being (Meston & Frohlich, 2000).8 Together, these biochemical responses reinforce the bond between partners, creating a powerful association between sexual activity and emotional connection. Over time, repeated experiences of sexual intimacy can strengthen these bonds, deepening emotional attachment and a sense of partnership, as supported by neuroscientific evidence on the mechanisms and circuitry of pair bonding (Walum & Young, 2019).9 Thus, biologically, sex functions as a potent mechanism for creating and reinforcing bonds between partners, facilitating intimacy and connection within relationships (1 Corinthians 7:3–5).

Not to mention that sexual intimacy carries a profound ability to forge bonds between individuals—bonds that many believe extend beyond the physical realm. Through shared vulnerability, trust, and closeness, emotional connections are formed, deepening the attachment between partners. Such intimacy often enhances communication, understanding, and empathy, leading to greater emotional closeness and overall relationship satisfaction. Beyond physical pleasure, sex serves as a powerful expression of love, affection, and commitment, reinforcing the devotion and unity between two people. It not only satisfies physical desires but also nourishes the emotional and relational needs at the core of human connection, enriching and strengthening the bonds that unite us.

Some Christians also speak of what are called soul ties. While the concept is debated, Scripture does affirm that deep relational bonds can exist even outside a sexual context. When a special person enters your life and you form a profound connection—whether through friendship, shared purpose, or mutual loyalty—your souls can, in a sense, be “knit together.” This is illustrated in 1 Samuel 18:1: “And it came to pass, when he had made an end of speaking unto Saul, that the soul of Jonathan was knit with the soul of David, and Jonathan loved him as his own soul.” 

The bonds referred to here may be biological, emotional, psychological, or even spiritual. Whatever their nature, they demonstrate the deep and lasting connections that can result from intimate human relationships.

Outside of marriage, sexual activity can lead to the formation of unhealthy bonds that may hinder both spiritual growth and emotional well-being. Sexual intimacy engages not only the physical body but also the soul or spirit, for we are not merely composed of matter. This depth of connection can create a bond between individuals that transcends the physical, and when formed outside of יהוה’s design, it can carry damaging consequences. Such bonds may bring emotional baggage and relational complications, resulting in feelings of guilt, shame, unhealthy attachment, or even obsession—effects that can interfere with future relationships and personal development.

Casual or indiscriminate sexual encounters may lead to emotional distress, feelings of emptiness, or a sense of disconnection. Moreover, experiences such as infidelity, in particular, can cause betrayal, deep trust issues, and emotional trauma, often impacting mental health and leaving lasting psychological scars.

As a disclaimer, this is not to suggest that everyone is perpetually “tied” to their former partners or that an elaborate ritual is always necessary to break such bonds. Repentance and sincere intercession before the Father may be more than sufficient. Yet it should also be noted that even if such ties are not outwardly visible, this does not mean they do not exist.

Being sexually active outside of marriage may also affect future relationships through issues like comparison—for example, thinking, “This person doesn’t do that thing I liked that someone else did.” Such thoughts can lead to dissatisfaction or unrealistic expectations. Additionally, if either partner has been sexually active with others, it may give rise to distrust, lowered self-esteem, or jealousy.

Retroactive jealousy and resentment are emotional responses often rooted in a partner’s previous romantic or sexual history. Retroactive jealousy is characterised by intrusive thoughts, insecurity, and obsessive questioning about a partner’s past. Resentment, on the other hand, may stem from perceived injustices or unresolved emotions tied to that past.

In relationships, these feelings can gradually erode trust and intimacy. They may cause individuals to compare themselves to previous partners, feel threatened by past experiences, or struggle with recurrent negative thoughts. If not addressed, such emotions can undermine healthy communication and lead to ongoing conflict within the relationship.

I’d like to briefly address something that relates to retroactive jealousy. I have met Christians who, when speaking about their sexually active past, will say something along the lines of: “I am glad that it happened because I got to learn from it.” While I can understand the sentiment—and agree that we can indeed learn from our past mistakes—I would argue that it would have been far better to have gained that understanding without ever committing fornication in the first place.

Moreover, it is unwise to think or speak in this way, especially if we are going to share such thoughts with someone of the opposite sex whom we may be pursuing, or who may be pursuing us. For many, hearing such a statement can be discouraging or even contribute to retroactive jealousy. It may even be perceived as expressing a kind of gladness for having engaged in sexual intimacy with that person, rather than sorrow over the sin itself. In this way, it can come across as a lack of genuine regret or remorse for engaging in sin, rather than a heartfelt acknowledgment of its wrongness.

Speaking personally, I wish—if I may use the expression—that I could go back and begin my life anew, carrying the understanding I now have, and never engage in such activity. The consequences of those choices have been destructive in my life. I wish instead that I had reserved myself for just one person, as יהוה intended.

I realise we cannot go back or erase our past, and that our past inevitably shapes who we are today. Yet I believe we should still feel a measure of regret and even shame for what was contrary to יהוה’s design, and we should long that our lives might have been different. In support of this, the Scripture says in Ezekiel 36:24–32:

“And I shall take you from among the gentiles, and I shall gather you out of all lands, and I shall bring you into your own land. “And I shall sprinkle clean water on you, and you shall be clean – from all your filthiness and from all your idols I cleanse you. “And I shall give you a new heart and put a new spirit within you. And I shall take the heart of stone out of your flesh, and I shall give you a heart of flesh, and put My Spirit within you. And I shall cause you to walk in My laws and guard My right-rulings and shall do them. “And you shall dwell in the land that I gave to your fathers. And you shall be My people, and I shall be your Aluhym. “And I shall save you from all your uncleannesses. And I shall call for the grain and increase it, and I shall bring no scarcity of food upon you. “And I shall increase the fruit of your trees and the increase of your fields, so that you need never again bear the reproach of scarcity of food among the gentiles. “And you shall remember your evil ways and your deeds that were not good. And you shall loathe yourselves in your own eyes, for your crookednesses and your abominations. “Not for your sake am I acting,” declares the Master יהוה, “let it be known to you. Be ashamed and blush for your ways, O house of Yisra’ĕl!”

Sin is never good, and even if we learn a lesson from it, that lesson does not make the sin itself good. To be clear, I am not saying it is wrong to be thankful for the understanding we have gained through past mistakes. However, it would be far better if we did not have to learn such lessons through sin, but instead could gain them by other means.

Likewise, I am not suggesting that we should live under a crushing weight of guilt and shame that makes life unworkable. Yet, when kept within a healthy measure, sorrow over sin can lead to repentance, and repentance can lead to deliverance, as the Scripture says in 2 Corinthians 7:9–11:

“I now rejoice, not that you were made sad, but that you were saddened into repenting. For you were made sad according to Aluhym, so that you suffered no loss from us. For sadness according to Aluhym works repentance to deliverance, not to be regretted, but the sadness of the world works death. For see how you have been saddened according to Aluhym – how much it worked out in you eagerness; indeed, clearing of yourselves; indeed, displeasure; indeed, fear; indeed, longing; indeed, ardour; indeed, righting of wrong! In every way you proved yourselves to be clear in the matter.”

We should feel sorrow and remorse for what was against יהוה’s will. And even if, for some reason, such feelings are absent, openly expressing gladness that we were intimate with someone in our past is unwise. It fails to show ultimate respect to the person we are now with—or hope to be with—and may become a cause or contributor to retroactive jealousy in that relationship.

3. Disintegration of Intimate Relationships: 

When sex is removed from the covenant of marriage and treated as casual, recreational, or without consequence, it undermines the very foundation upon which strong and lasting relationships are built. This shift leads to serious relational and societal breakdowns. A culture that prioritises personal gratification over commitment promotes fleeting encounters, unstable relationships, and a diminished understanding of fidelity and trust.

Research indicates that individuals who cohabit before marriage—particularly before engagement—face higher risks of relationship dissatisfaction and dissolution, with broader studies suggesting that such patterns often accompany more casual attitudes toward sex and commitment (Stanley, Rhoades, & Markman, 2006).10 The traditional family unit—rooted in the exclusive, lifelong union of a man and a woman—is increasingly replaced by fractured households, cohabitation without substantial commitment, and single-parent families formed not solely out of hardship but also as a result of separating sex from responsibility (Wilcox & Kuo, 2019).11

As the family structure weakens, the consequences extend beyond the home. Data from the Institute for Family Studies show that children raised in intact, married-parent families generally fare better across a wide range of emotional and academic outcomes than those raised in non-intact families (Wilcox et al., 2017).12 Similarly, the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services reports that children from single-parent homes are at greater risk for behavioural problems, academic difficulties, and emotional instability (Child Welfare Information Gateway, 2013).13 Marriage also increases the likelihood that fathers and mothers maintain positive relationships with their children and provides greater family stability (Wilcox et al., 2011).14 The absence of a stable parental presence—especially fathers—has been linked to higher risks of poverty, teen pregnancy, substance abuse, and criminal activity (McLanahan & Sandefur, 1994; National Fatherhood Initiative, 2021; Popenoe, 1996).15

On a societal level, the widespread acceptance of casual sex has been associated with shifting family norms, which some researchers suggest may weaken community ties, increase dependence on state welfare, and undermine the moral foundations that once upheld social order (Popenoe, 1996).16 The loss of strong, multigenerational families means fewer spaces where values are taught, discipline is nurtured, and identity is formed through love and security.

4. Objectification and Exploitation: 

In societies where sex is commodified and individuals are treated as mere objects of gratification, there is a heightened risk of objectification, exploitation, and abuse. UNICEF USA highlights that sexual objectification contributes to harmful gender stereotypes that normalise violence against girls—underscoring how treating individuals as sexual objects can increase risks of exploitation and abuse, particularly for women and girls, by promoting the idea that their value lies primarily in their physical appearance and sexual availability (UNICEF USA, n.d.).17 Vulnerable populations such as women, children, and marginalised groups are therefore especially susceptible to harm in environments where sexual boundaries are disregarded.

This is supported by findings showing that higher levels of self-objectification and partner-objectification are associated with lower relationship satisfaction (Ramsey, Marotta, & Hoyt, 2017).18 As reported by PsyPost (2023) and confirmed by empirical research, women who experience objectification in their relationships often face increased emotional labour, reduced sexual fulfilment, and diminished satisfaction.19 I have personally encountered numerous individuals who trivialise sex, reducing it to a mechanical act devoid of emotional, psychological, or spiritual depth. Many believe it is necessary to engage in sex before marriage to “test compatibility,” suggesting that affection, feelings, and commitment are conditional on personal gratification—implying, “I only truly like or love you if you satisfy me.” Such a utilitarian mindset treats relationships as transactions, valuing others for what they can provide rather than who they are. This stands in stark contrast to the biblical view that every person is an image-bearer of the Most High, worthy of love, respect, and dignity, and instead reflects an approach devoid of genuine love or mutual respect, where others are seen as objects for use rather than persons to be cherished and loved.

When sex is treated casually, people—particularly women—are often reduced to objects of pleasure rather than honoured as covenant partners and image-bearers of the Most High, worthy of love, respect, and dignity. This distortion of intimacy undermines the sanctity of marriage as יהוה intended: a holy, exclusive, lifelong covenant, and fosters a lust-driven, highly sexualised mindset that is difficult to overcome and damaging if carried into marriage. Research on self-objectification—when individuals begin to view themselves primarily in terms of sexual attractiveness rather than as a whole person—shows it is linked to negative psychological outcomes such as body shame, anxiety, and sexual dysfunction, all of which can severely harm marital relationships (Calogero, Davis, & Thompson, 2005).20

5. Normalisation of Harmful Behaviours: 

A culture that condones or promotes sex without moral or relational boundaries—such as casual sex—inevitably contributes to the erosion of respect, responsibility, and consent that protect human dignity. As Ward (2016) observes, “The sexualization of media content and culture more broadly has been linked to normalizing casual sex and reducing the perceived importance of commitment, respect, and consent in sexual relationships” (p. 565).21 Research indicates that when sexual intimacy is trivialised and detached from commitment, it weakens the social norms that discourage coercion and exploitation (Edwards, 2011; National Sexual Violence Resource Center, n.d.).22 This concern is echoed in broader commentary linking the sexualisation of culture with increased tolerance of coercion and objectification (The Sun, 2021).23

This breakdown of boundaries can increase the risk of harmful behaviours such as sexual assault, rape, and prostitution, which can also include participation in pornography—whether through its production, promotion, or consumption. As Ward (2016) explains, “When sexual behavior is portrayed primarily as recreational and devoid of emotional connection or responsibility, it can contribute to attitudes that tolerate or excuse coercive and exploitative behaviors, undermining moral and relational boundaries” (p. 572).24 Studies show that pornography consumption, especially violent or degrading material, is associated with greater acceptance of sexual aggression (Hald, Malamuth, & Yuen, 2010; Coyne & Rasmussen, 2016) and can contribute to desensitisation over time (Fight the New Drug, 2024; Owens, Behun, Manning, & Reid, 2012).25 Over time, the repeated acceptance or portrayal of such acts can normalise behaviours once recognised as destructive and immoral, eroding empathy and moral resistance (Vega & Malamuth, 2007).26

6. Parental Example and Generational Influence

Even when parents attempt to teach their children to refrain from sex outside of marriage, their own past behaviour—especially if known to the child—can undermine the message. Children, particularly during adolescence and rebellion, are quick to observe hypocrisy and may dismiss guidance as insincere or invalid: "You did it—that’s why I’m here," they might argue. This highlights a vital principle: our actions, even if we believe them to be personal or in the past, rarely affect only ourselves.

Children often know more and see more than we expect. They notice inconsistencies and, whether consciously or not, learn through example more than instruction. Research affirms this truth—children are significantly shaped by the observed behaviour of adults around them, especially parents. Bandura’s (1977) social learning theory demonstrates that much of human behaviour is acquired through observation and imitation, making consistent modelling crucial.27 Lickona (2004) emphasises character education through consistent modelling of virtues, noting that young people internalise values by seeing them lived out in daily life, not just hearing about them.28 The Center on the Developing Child at Harvard University (2011) likewise highlights how early experiences, particularly the behaviour and attitudes modelled by caregivers, shape children’s executive function, self-regulation, and moral reasoning.29 When parents fail to model the values they seek to instil, it not only weakens their moral authority but may also perpetuate patterns of sin into the next generation. This is why Scripture emphasises living as examples—not just for the world, but first and foremost within our homes (Deuteronomy 6:6–7; Proverbs 22:6).

This calls for sober reflection. Parents must not only instruct their children in righteousness but live it visibly, knowing that their example—good or bad—echoes into the next generation (Maybe reflecting what we see in Exodus 20:4-5). Where there has been failure, repentance must be genuine, and change must be evident. This is not about perfection, but about integrity—a life that consistently aligns with the truth we profess, beginning within our own homes.

Summary

Deviating from יהוה’s design by engaging in sex outside of marriage carries serious and far-reaching consequences. Such actions not only harm individuals, families, and communities, but also weaken the moral fabric of society. Moreover, Scripture makes clear that sexual sin affects our spiritual condition and disrupts our fellowship with יהוה.

Embracing Holiness and Purity

In a world where sexual norms and behaviours often diverge from יהוה's design, it is crucial for us as believers to understand and uphold the principles of sexual purity and holiness that our Creator and Master calls us to embrace.

As followers of Messiah, we are commanded to flee sexual immorality and instead honour יהוה with both our bodies and our actions, as 1 Corinthians 6:18–20 exhorts:

“Flee whoring. Every sin that a man does is outside the body, but he who commits whoring sins against his own body. Or do you not know that your body is the Dwelling Place of the Set-apart Spirit who is in you, which you have from Aluhym, and you are not your own? For you were bought with a price, therefore esteem Aluhym in your body and in your spirit, which are of Aluhym.”

This is a call to holiness — to live in purity, abstaining from all sexual sin and honouring the covenant of marriage. Sha’ul makes it clear that sexual sin is uniquely destructive, for it defiles not only the outward life but also the inner person. Though we may not fully grasp the depth of this harm, Scripture presents it as a matter of utmost seriousness, demanding our sober attention.

The early believers lived in a Greco-Roman world where sexual immorality was normalised and often celebrated. Our present culture is much the same. Therefore, Sha’ul’s words remain a vital reminder: our bodies do not belong to us. They have been purchased at the highest cost and must be kept set apart for the service and glory of יהוה — not surrendered to the fleeting pleasures of sin.

Some commentaries on these verses say the following:

Ellicott's Commentary for English Readers

“Flee fornication.—These last three verses of the chapter contain a solemn exhortation to purity, arising out of the previous argument.

Without the body.—The word “body” is still to be understood as used of the whole “human nature,” which is spoken of in 1Corinthians 6:19 as the temple of the Holy Ghost. Other sins may profane only outer courts of the temple; this sin penetrates with its deadly foulness into the very holy of holies—

“It hardens a’ within, and petrifies the feelings.”

There is a deep significance and profound truth in the solemn words of the Litany, “From fornication, and all other deadly sin, good Lord, deliver us.””

Matthew Henry's Concise Commentary

“6:12-20 Some among the Corinthians seem to have been ready to say, All things are lawful for me. This dangerous conceit St. Paul opposes. There is a liberty wherewith Christ has made us free, in which we must stand fast. But surely a Christian would never put himself into the power of any bodily appetite. The body is for the Lord; is to be an instrument of righteousness to holiness, therefore is never to be made an instrument of sin. It is an honour to the body, that Jesus Christ was raised from the dead; and it will be an honour to our bodies, that they will be raised. The hope of a resurrection to glory, should keep Christians from dishonouring their bodies by fleshly lusts. And if the soul be united to Christ by faith, the whole man is become a member of his spiritual body. Other vices may be conquered in fight; that here cautioned against, only by flight. And vast multitudes are cut off by this vice in its various forms and consequences. Its effects fall not only directly upon the body, but often upon the mind. Our bodies have been redeemed from deserved condemnation and hopeless slavery by the atoning sacrifice of Christ. We are to be clean, as vessels fitted for our Master's use. Being united to Christ as one spirit, and bought with a price of unspeakable value, the believer should consider himself as wholly the Lord's, by the strongest ties. May we make it our business, to the latest day and hour of our lives, to glorify God with our bodies, and with our spirits which are his.”

Pulpit Commentary

“Verse 18. - Flee fornication. In the battle against sensual sins, there is no victory except in absolute flight, for the reason which immediately follows, namely, that these sins have their dwelling in that body which is part of our being, and which yet they tend to destroy. They make a man his own deadliest enemy. Every sin... is without the body. Some have supposed that this cannot apply to gluttony and drunkenness, which they therefore class with fornication; but even in those sins, as in suicide, the cause of and incentive to the sin is external, whereas the source of uncleanness is in the heart and in the thoughts, which come from within, and so defile the man. Other sins may be with and by means of the body, and may injure the body; but none are so directly against the sanctity of the whole bodily being as fornication. Sinneth against his own body. By alienating it from the service of him to whom it belongs; by incorporating it with the degradation of another; by staining the flesh and the body (Proverbs 5:8-11; Proverbs 6:24-32; Proverbs 7:24-27); by subtly poisoning the inmost sanctities of his own being. St. Paul is here thinking mainly, however, if not exclusively, of the moral injury and defilement. 1 Corinthians 6:18”

Furthermore, Sha’ul, in 2 Timothy 2:22, calls us to flee from youthful lusts, desires that often lead to sexual sin, and instead to pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace alongside those who call on the Master from a clean heart:

“And flee from the lusts of youth, but pursue righteousness, belief, love, peace with those calling on the Master out of a clean heart.”

Additionally, Hebrews 13:4 says the following: 

“Let marriage be respected by all, and the bed be undefiled. But Aluhym shall judge those who whore, and adulterers.”

This verse emphasises the sanctity of marriage and the importance of honouring it. It admonishes believers to hold marriage in high esteem and to keep the marriage bed pure and undefiled. The verse also serves as a sober reminder that יהוה will judge those who engage in sexual immorality, including those who practice adultery. In essence, it calls for reverence for the institution of marriage and fidelity within it, whilst also highlighting the consequences of straying from יהוה's design for relationships.

Lastly, 1 Corinthians 7:2 says the following: 

“But because of whoring, let each one have his own wife, and let each woman have her own husband.”

Here the apostle Sha’ul addresses the issue of sexual immorality by encouraging believers to pursue marriage as a means of safeguarding against the temptation of whoring. He advises that each man should have his own wife, and each woman should have her own husband, emphasising the importance of committed relationships within the bounds of marriage. This verse underscores the value of marital fidelity and the role of marriage in providing a healthy outlet for sexual expression within יהוה's design for human relationships.

Further on in the chapter, Sha’ul writes the following in 1 Corinthians 7:8-9:

“And I say to the unmarried and to the widows: It is good for them if they remain even as I am, but if they do not have self-control, let them marry, for it is better to marry than to burn.”

Notably, Sha’ul does not make allowance for masturbation or sexual activity outside of marriage as an outlet for such passions. Instead, he plainly states that those unable to exercise self-control should marry, affirming that marriage — not sexual compromise — is the divinely appointed remedy for such desires.

The Pulpit Commentary explains this passage as follows:

“Verse 9. - If they cannot contain; rather, if they have not continency. Let them marry. In 1 Timothy 5:14 he lays down and justifies the same rule with reference to young widows. It is better to marry than to burn. The original tenses give greater force and beauty to this obvious rule of Christian common sense and morality. The "marry" is in the aorist - "to marry once for all," and live in holy married union; the "burn" is in the present - "to be on fire with concupiscence." Marriage once for all is better than continuous lust; the former is permitted, the latter sinful. 1 Corinthians 7:9”

This commentary reinforces Sha’ul’s point: the proper context for sexual desire is the covenant of marriage. Rather than yielding to burning lust, which can lead to sin, Scripture encourages the believer to enter into marriage—a union set apart and approved by יהוה.

That said, this instruction must not be taken to mean that believers should rashly marry the first person who comes along simply to relieve sexual tension. Sadly, many within the body of Messiah have entered marriage hastily, without genuine love or compatibility, and have later faced the pain of divorce. Scripture calls us to walk in wisdom, not folly, and to exercise discernment when choosing a spouse — seeking יהוה’s guidance and ensuring the foundation of the relationship is strong in faith, character, and commitment.

Extending Grace and Compassion

One of the most sobering sexual scandals recorded in Scripture involves David — a man whom יהוה Himself described as “a man after My own heart” (1 Samuel 13:14; Acts 13:22). Despite this high commendation, David committed adultery with another man’s wife and even orchestrated the man’s death to cover his sin. His actions were grievous in the eyes of יהוה and brought severe consequences, including the death of his child. Yet when the prophet Nathan confronted him, David responded with deep repentance and humility — a posture reflected in the psalm he penned, Psalm 51. This account reminds us that no one is beyond the reach of repentance and the redemption offered by יהוה.

While we are called to uphold יהוה’s standards of holiness and purity, we must also meet those who have fallen into sexual sin with compassion and grace. Scripture affirms that “all have sinned and fall short of the esteem of Aluhym” (Romans 3:23), and all of us remain dependent upon יהוה’s mercy and forgiveness. It is only through His grace that we find redemption and healing.

Therefore, rather than approaching the fallen with condemnation, we are to extend the same grace we have received — offering prayer, encouragement, and support to help them turn from sin and walk in obedience to יהוה’s Word. Truth is never to be abandoned, but it must be spoken with warmth and gentleness, so that hearts are more open to correction and more willing to return to יהוה. As Sha’ul exhorts in Galatians 6:1:

“Brothers, if a man is overtaken in some trespass, you who are spiritual restore such a one in a spirit of meekness, watching yourself lest you also be tried.”

May we be people who not only stand unwaveringly for truth but also embody the mercy of Messiah — leading others toward restoration, not rejection.

Conclusion

I will take this opportunity to share a short testimony. 

I myself have engaged in sexual immorality, and it has radically affected my entire life! In doing so, it changed not only who I was, but who I could have been. It opened a door that invited confusion, regret, and a host of emotional and spiritual consequences. It altered the way I viewed women, reshaped how I approached relationships, and distorted my perceptions of love and intimacy. It would be fair to say that even now, I feel the ripple effects of those choices.

Furthermore, when separation follows an intimate connection with someone you’ve spent significant time building a deep bond with, the aftermath can be devastating. Guilt, heartbreak, pain, despair, and deep emotional wounds often follow—and all of this can have a profound and lasting impact on your life from that point forward. Even in trying to move on, the aftermath can cause you to close yourself off emotionally, building barriers that hinder connection, empathy, and understanding. Suppressing or denying your emotions can lead to emotional numbness and detachment, ultimately hardening your heart. This, in turn, can result in an inability to experience joy, love, and fulfilment, as well as difficulties in processing and expressing emotions in a healthy way. When Sha’ul says that sexual immorality is a sin against one's own body (1 Corinthians 6:18), he is not exaggerating.

Worse still, sexual sin has impacted my relationship with יהוה. It has dulled my sensitivity to His Spirit and hindered my spiritual growth, setting me back years in my walk with Him. I don’t say this to suggest that I am not being renewed—I am. יהוה is at work in me. But I also want to be honest that sexual sin leaves a mark.

Having experienced both the fleeting pleasure and the long-term ramifications of such actions, I can say wholeheartedly and truthfully: it’s not worth it. It’s like eating a tasty dish laced with poison—yes, it might taste good, though perhaps not even as good as it’s made out to be—but in the end, it harms you. So, to anyone who has not engaged in sexual activity but sees it idealised and romanticised by society, or observes others around them participating and feels like they’re missing out on something worthwhile—think again. Opening yourself up to something you’re not meant to have outside of its proper context only leads to harm, confusion, and ultimately being lost—and worse, both spiritually and even physically dead.

Therefore, practice self-control, wait, and be patient. I don’t say this to suggest that sex isn’t beautiful or meaningful—but it truly is only that when experienced within a sincerely loving and committed marital relationship. Outside of that, it’s simply not worth having.

I’m sure there will be those who think I’m exaggerating, or that sexual sin isn’t that serious or doesn’t carry real consequences. But I’m speaking honestly from my own experience—I know how deeply it has affected me. Perhaps some people say these things because they don’t recognise the gravity of their actions, or because denial makes it easier to continue engaging in illicit sex. I don’t know. Regardless, my personal testimony is not the foundation anyone should rely on for choosing to abstain from sex outside of marriage. That foundation should be the Word of יהוה, which clearly and repeatedly warns against sexual immorality.

While it’s clear that sex offers many benefits to humanity, it is essential that it be enjoyed within the context prescribed by יהוה. In light of the challenges we’ve discussed, there is a growing need for individuals and communities to reaffirm the sacredness of sex—helping people recognise its true purpose and spiritual significance within a loving, committed marriage. By fostering open and honest conversations about what constitutes righteous sex, grounded in Scriptural values, we can encourage others to seek lasting meaning and fulfilment beyond fleeting pleasures, while also restoring a sense of reverence for the sanctity of sex in our society—something that would bring with it abundant physical and spiritual blessings.

As we conclude, let us remember that sexual immorality is a serious matter in the eyes of יהוה. While many of us may struggle with sexually immoral tendencies, we must hold fast to the words of James 4:7: “So then, submit yourselves to Aluhym. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.” Therefore, we must make no provision for the lusts of the flesh, but resist—and even flee—the temptation to commit sexual immorality. Doing so will strengthen us and make it easier to stand firm when future temptations arise.

Let us remember that we can do all things through Messiah who strengthens us! Let us commit ourselves to lives of purity and holiness, honouring יהוה with our bodies and our actions. May we seek His strength and guidance each day as we strive to walk in obedience to His will, confident in His faithfulness to forgive and restore all who repent and turn to Him. Amen.

Selah: Romans 13:14 — “… put on the Master יהושוע Messiah, and make no provision for the lusts of the flesh.”

May יהוה be with you and bless you.

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